Maybe I should just stop fighting it... Im getting old or turning into my mother ( *shudder*)
I can hear the faint strains of Terry Wogan calling me....
Suddenly Im looking at furry slippers more longingly than my Louboutins....
The werthers are just a "in my day" away.... *gulp*

But
I can bite my tongue no longer!

"Girls,girls,girls!" [said in best Miss Jean Brodie voice ]
What is with all the swearing that has slowly crept into the forum recently??
It wasnt like that in my day {ah! see!! I said it..pass the werthers quick!!}

Seriously though (I can be) and believe me Im no prude, the average day in this house runs very much like the opening scene of Four Weddings and a Funeral (eff! effety! effety effety!! whats that dog rolled in now???.... except of course Hugh Grant didnt say the bit about the dog, however, I digress )
But
Despite me being no angel I do like being able to read this board without any particularly foul or offensive language, its so refreshing. We all know which swear words can cause offence,but there was always an unwritten rule/standard that we all kept to where by even the milder swear words were not used or even asterixed.
On active topics running at time of writing I can see a fair few (not even asterixed).

Sad sign of the times?
Are we losing something that made us fairly unique and professional???
Or are you reading this thinking I should as we say in my line of work 'Sierra Oscar' off?

To quote the much missed Carla...
"thoughts"..........

Yes HG I totally agree with you. We are all "alittle" agitated tonight  but the point comes across clearly and intelligently with out stooping to the ignorant use of language to attain eloquence.

Totally agree HG

No need for anglo saxon in a post.  Unless of course the poster is verbally and grammatically challenged   in which case their inadequacies are showing

Pass the Werthers HG   make sure they're not the soft ones, my falsies get all gummed up

I came to this post via a link that Isabel posted in the hot topic...

Thanks Isabel, and to HuskyGal a very good point well made.

Irrespective of how we (meaning I !!) use this language at home in private conversation it really is different when you see it written down.  If nothing else it does make it more difficult to read (as does capital letters).

Like you HG I like to vent with expletives on occasion but only in my own company or those adults very close to me.  However, in public restraint is called for. 

In my local Sainsburys last week there was an old guy shouting the odds at counter staff who were doing their best to direct him to management. Then in probable frustration the younger counter assistant swore at the customer and I thought, alas, the assistant just lost the argument in one word. 

BTW my hubby doesn't swear and I find that endearing.

'Sierra Oscar'

Now, I always thought it was Foxtrot Oscar

Whats the point of cussing anyways?  We should be proffessionals, even when a topic gets heated.  There have been times, when at the computer I am cussing the the screen when I read something, but so far (I think) I havent cussed on the forum.  (apart from using terms in dog appropriate language).

Remember too, that people can google this, and if they are in search of pups or whatever, they see people cussing and acting unprofessional, it goes down on them.  A lot of people have personal websites in their information, and if you cus, you can send the wrong image. 

Even though every day, we cuss.  But it shouldnt be used on a public forum.  Also, I believe their are a few kids on here as well (I remember a topic where a poster was only 9 years old or something).  They are reading this too........

Swearing shows a lack of imagination and intellectual quality IMO

But sometimes a good old swear and a stamp of the foot does wonders for ones constitution  LOL

Agree with you completely Liv ...if you cannot give a a succinct and foul language free comment then you shouldn't bother! Other boards have allowed some leeway with the language and I think it is horrible

Whilst we can talk the talk (we don't swear much in my house but we do (scratch that - *I* do) swear occasionally ......) when you are writing it takes longer, you have to think more and that, to me, negates the impulsiveness of swearing ..

YAY GO LIV!!

>But sometimes a good old swear and a stamp of the foot does wonders for ones constitution

Completely agree...but NOT when writing

just realised, where did carla go?

> but NOT when writing

And behind closed doors!

> when you are writing it takes longer, you have to think more and that, to me, negates the impulsiveness of swearing ..

I agree.

I must agree with Bilbobaggins too though - an occassional swear word in real life can do wonders! It wouldn't have the same effect if I swore all the time though.

Well said Liv
I really don,t like swear words written but like my old mate says
"theres nothing like the dog world to make you swear" like most of us I can and do but please not on here.
I come on here for peace and relaxation and surely we can all get along without the swear words.

theres nothing like the dog world to make you swear

> Whilst we can talk the talk (we don't swear much in my house but we do (scratch that - *I* do) swear occasionally ......) when you are writing it takes longer, you have to think more and that, to me, negates the impulsiveness of swearing ..
>

I agree

Like most I will say the occasional *bad* word in anger or frustration but when you are posting there should be no need for it. I know I am growing old when I cannot stand the youth of today and their constant stream of foul language lol

I swear a lot when it's just me & the dogs, but I hardly ever swear if anyone can hear me. I was brought up by old fashioned parents who told me off for even a 'damn' or 'blast'. Unfortunately I now work in a construction company where I am surrounded by F, F, F, all day long. The MD is one of the worst offenders so there is no way to complain, but I find it extremely offensive.

> just realised, where did carla go?

Thompson,

I think the selfish Horsey forums stole her from us
As you might remember she'd just had a baby, so took some time out.This forum can be a bit draining too when too many threads get their Alan Wickers in a twist, so think she just wanted some time out.Hope she comes back soon its been a while.

Isnt the saying,
'As soon as you have to swear to get your point accross you have lost the argument'
Says it all really!!!!!!!
Lea

swearing does not offend me at all and I regularly swear, probably more out of habit than anything. 

This board never ceases to amaze me but it shows how we are all different and have different standards and norms. 

A curse or two doesn't offend me in the slightest but people culling dogs becuase there are the wrong colour/too many of them etc fills me with horror and I find the god complex element extremely offensive.  I guess we all have different tolerances to different things and quite possibly the bulk of my work environment over the years being full of cheeky swearing young people has raised my tolerance to alleged 'bad' language.  I find racist, sexist and discriminatory language far more offensive than percieved 'naughty' words.

>Like most I will say the occasional *bad* word in anger or frustration but when you are posting there should be no need for it.

Ditto. People speak in the heat of the moment, and a rare, well-timed swearword is very empowering! But because when typing we all have to finish the sentence we're typing before we post, all Bad Words are deliberate and not accidental.

For me, swearing is only vaguely acceptable (and I hold up my hands and confess to swearing at times, even though I know it's wrong) when it's verbal, never written.

> I guess we all have different tolerances to different things

That's the point.  You might choose to use these words at home or amongst friends who we know well and know will not be offended but when we are amongst people that we don't know and don't know what is acceptable to them it is surely a matter of respect to mind our P's and Q's.

I swear a lot, I do try not too however and I dont ever say really offensive swear words just a mild S***t or B*****d or B****x
I do it out of frustration mainly as Im not the worlds most eloquent when it comes to big words to explain something or big words to argue a point, Im not thick and I do know what im talking about,but  if I cant get my point across the way its meant and people have misunderstood me then i get frustrated ...no excuse I know and sorry if ive offended anyone on here I dont mean too.
ill try not to do it again

> This board never ceases to amaze me

Ali,

I'd hate for you to think that the recent pedigree debate threads running at the moment were what prompted me to post this discussion, or that by implication I place more importance in this than I do clearly unacceptable language that is racist,sexist etc.

From my perspective:
Clearly unacceptable language is against TOS and is something that does not appear on the forums, so not an issue.
You've been a member for a while now so you know that this forum is fairly unique in that swear words dont get used or rather never used to (when im joined the forum we would even be told off for saying "oh god!"),The last couple of weeks Ive seen swear words creep in more and more(it wasnt the pedigree thread that prompted me I'd been noticing it for a while and wanted to wait and see if it was just a few threads but turns out its becoming fairly prolific), and point really is that a standard that we had is slipping.This is after all an infomation exchange first and foremost and not a chat room,and so I do feel an element of proffessionalism is lost.

I do agree with you, in terms of what we find offensive, and I believe the culling issue has been debated and opions voiced elsewhere and the others you mention have to my memory never actually been written on the forum?? So I cant iclude something that hasnt actually happened.
Hope that makes it clearer, Im really no Mary Whitehouse

lol, that wasn't what I was thinking at all.  TBH I have never had an issue with any of your posts as you always deliver your message in a positive manner without any derision or being patronising.  I have never seen you ripping new people to bits over 'stupid questions' or engaging in petty one-upmanship and I don't think I have ever seen any ego getting in the way of information exchange with your posts and I would say that along with Teri I find your posts the most informative and helpful.

I go on a few other forums where lots of words are automatically starred out so but this one has always been very clean cut.  For a board that many of the members describe as non-fluffy I am often surprised at the things that offend people.  I too remember one member getting a total slating for writing 'oh my ***' to exclaim her surprise about something.  I find it absolutely bizarre but I suppose because I don't breed dogs and don't have a docked breed the many debates over the years about docking, culling etc have at times shocked me. My comments are not aimed at anyone in particular but just a mixture of observations over the years both on and off forum.

Good point... Hopefully im not too guilty of this myself on the forum...

But IRL and in pms/emails adn especially msn BOY do i have a potty mouth..

Not sure when it crept in, and i am very guilty of forgetting at times that it is offensive to other people (obviously i am aware its not appropriate in the main forum..)..

I do LIKE a good swear word though and i find myself inventing new ones all the time, and not using the customary four letter words either... i like the ridiculously silly ones... like... puddle sniffer (try it on someone 'Why you PUDDLE SNIFFER!!!) or 'bumeyes' (shamelessly stolen from weebl and bob.. )..

Now.. do those count in this post and this context, as proper swear words... or not?

> I do LIKE a good swear word though and i find myself inventing new ones all the time, and not using the customary four letter words either... i like the ridiculously silly ones... like... puddle sniffer (try it on someone 'Why you PUDDLE SNIFFER!!!) or 'bumeyes' (shamelessly stolen from weebl and bob.. )..
>
> Now.. do those count in this post and this context, as proper swear words... or not?

I think it's probably under the definition of name calling so not something I'd want to read in a post on this forum.  Is it actual swearing?  As I tell my kids it's the intention rather than the words they use that count!  If they're shouting at volume and flinging words at each other in anger or annoyance it doesn't really matter what word they use if they're still trying to be mean.  I don't mind the creativity but I'd rather they didn't do it on the school bus!!

I agree dogs a babe....
I swear at the dogs.......the OH grumbles at me saying what is that rubbish all about? My response is that they know exactly what I mean as does he!
Sometimes it really is the tone that matters not the exact words.#
The art of eloquence is the ability to raise the roof using your eyebrows...not your voice.

Karen

Oooh, I think I actually put bl***y in a post recently so I apologise here and now.  Swearing really isn't that good

CG

"The art of eloquence is the ability to raise the roof using your eyebrows...not your voice"
Very well put!
Couldn't agree more!

Bump.

What?What?  I've missed it. Who's cussin' ?

I'll shall PM you .

I admit to swearing the worst when I'm in the car,i have bad road rage.The words that come out of my mouth sometimes shock me!
I also swear when i want to get a point across to someone that just isn't getting it! A well placed swear word get's the seriousness across pretty quickly And i also use a cuss word when my daughter is getting on my nerves,either nagging me over and over for something,or just being generally annoying.I could sit there and talk to her for an hour in a calm manner,but as soon as an irate  swear word leaves my mouth she knows to stop,and she does!

I don't class the words 'damn',shite,God or 'bloody' etc swear words though.It's the F and the C words...

I don't care if people want to swear on forums.No it's not particularly nice to read,but i have found that the people who have a go at people who swear, come across as having a holier than thou,almost arrogant air about them,and that annoys me even more (Not aimed at you Olivia)

The thing is would you swear at a stranger which is effectively what swearing on forums is. Yes we believe we get to know people and some of us have actually met but there are very few of us who actually know each other.
Then there is the question of the unseen readers some of which may well be younger than we would want, do we carry on regardless or show some decorum (LOL love that word) and contain our own frustrations as mature thinking adults ?
I am not a big swearer in the flesh, not because I'm a prude or holier than thou, simply because I dont often feel the need to express myself in that way.

Well I'm certainly not whiter than white on the swearing front amongst people I know, but I very much appreciate the fact that this forum (largely) stays away from the swearing and text speak that are so prevalent on most. Long may it last, I say!

M.

> very much appreciate the fact that this forum (largely) stays away from the swearing and text speak that are so prevalent on most. Long may it last, I say!
>
> M.

.................Hear, Hear!    or is it Here, Here!! 

> I don't class the words 'damn',shite,God or 'bloody' etc swear words though.

The point is a great many people do so, given the point of this thread, it would have been nice not to have to read them here!

>> very much appreciate the fact that this forum (largely) stays away from the swearing and text speak that are so prevalent on most. Long may it last, I say!
>>
>> M.
> .................Hear, Hear!    or is it Here, Here!! 

I second that emotion
I dont mind swearing per say but my Hubby just hates it, so it is not used in our home.
And yes I believe it is Hear Hear  - as in yes please listen to this good sense

I took the children to see a firework display last night but was considering leaving because of the language that was being used nearby by more than one person. It wasn't a case of moving somewhere else because they all seemed to be doing it! And it wasn't even said in context, they were just using the most offensive words in the most benign of sentences - what's the point? I daren't have asked them to stop because I'd probably have got a mouthful of abuse.

It seems it's becoming more and more acceptable to swear now and it's everywhere you go.
Even Jamie Oliver is at it now. He was always nice and polite but now every other word is a swear word - I think he's trying to copy Mr. Ramsey.

Yes Oldilocks - hear hear from me too  - I don't like the fact that swearing is becoming so common-place - and I attend football matches where men still swear because they think it is a man's perogarative to swear in other men's company - I am searching for the word that describes the process that happens when folks switch off from somthing because it is used all the time - like watching too much violence on tv.  I don't think it is a bad thing to preserve this place as one where we feel comfortable.   What do these folks use to swear with when they are angry and frustrated when they use the f word all the time?  

>What do these folks use to swear with when they are angry and frustrated when they use the f word all the time?  

Physical violence instead of verbal violence.

> I am searching for the word that describes the process that happens when folks switch off from somthing because it is used all the time

desensitization

Oh thanks - brain slow this morning.

I am sure that I read a few days ago that Gordon Ramsey said that he was going to try to stop using the 'F' word, let us hope that Jamie Oliver copies him once again and stops using it too!!    I would be mortified if one my sons spoke like that, what do Mum Ramsey and Mum Oliver think I wonder!  

I can remember (apologies if I have told this one before) seeing a young lad at the football singing his little heart out - the words he was singing were rather choice but Dad obviously thought it was best not to make a fuss!  He was from a well educated background too. 

Put a swear box out I did and we all put money in even my workmen and we gave £175 to Tourettes charity - There is two on my desk now and we vote on who gets the cash its £1 a go and one surveyor if he has a really bad phone call to take will put in £5. Make money for the bad language!!